Bye John Jay -Thanks for Everything
I walked into John Jay College scared, and dreamy. I had it in my mind that what I saw on C.S.I was the only profession for me, while I tossed aside my Literary Awards for lab glasses. I then spent the next two years struggling to keep up with my peers and stuck in the tutoring center. I gave Forensic Science my all, but it wasn't enough.
The counseling department asked me to schedule a meeting with my counselor. I quickly emailed her, hoping meeting with her would miraculously increase my GPA. She reviewed my grades with me and told me what I already knew. I had to do something quickly or I'd risk my chances of staying at John Jay. She asked me about my Literature, and English courses. She noticed how well I did in those courses. I told her that those were my "easy A" courses because I enjoyed it. She then took her glasses off, and told me that what I enjoy is what I should be doing with my time. I agreed even thought I had already known.
The walk down to the English Department was longer than I expected. The administration told me that the department had been moved, but would return once the new building was completed. I was told to look for a Professor named Allison Pease. Her office was all the way at the end of a long corridor, which made the decision I was about to make even more daunting. I crossed my fingers hoping she was in, and she was there blonde haired, blue eyed, and smiling.
We spoke about my reason for leaving forensic science, and why I had so many apprehensions.I mentioned my family, and making them proud. Then I signed the paperwork to join the English Major. I walked out of her office, and called my mother...
Two years later, I stand as a graduate of John Jay College of Criminal Justice City University of New York with a Bachelors of Arts in English with Honors. To obtain honors status, I took part in an extra class, an independent study. Working alongside the Professor of choice, the student studies a topic of interest. We studied Post-Colonial Literature & Colonial Literature of India. Previously, I studied "PoCo" literature of Africa. This class comes with a mandatory assignment that determines passing. The assignment is a 25+ page thesis.
For my thesis I tried to connect post-colonial literature and post-colonial theory. Gender and female subjugation has always interested me. Running with these themes, I found that the female characters shared a powerful emotion. They shared a desire for autonomy, equality and power. They attempted to gain these desires through sex or the body. Sadly, using sex/desire as power does nothing for these women. Their place in the sex/gender system has already been made. I in no way seperate these women from myself. I understand how cultural and societal pressures cause humans to reach out for something to root them. I also understand that their is no shared or universal womens experience. Taking into account their individual situations was essential to my thesis.
... I got an A.
The learning at John Jay began in my senior year. That's when things started to flow, and slide into place, but now I'm done. I cried a little at Graduation. The most support came from my Professors, the love of a challenge was fueled by their teaching. All I can do is thank them...
Call me a geek! I love to learn.
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