Thursday, September 20, 2012

The Mis-Adventures of a Lesbian Online Dater pt. 3


women dating online

During the time of this little online dating adventure, I was down and out after a recent break up. Of course I wasn't completely innocent, but who is ever completely innocent? Anyway, I was on the rebound, and in some ways I wanted someone to hurt me as I had hurt the person previous. Turns out, karma, had the same plans in mind.

This is the story of "The Far too Confident Virgin"

I'll admit that I'm not always a deep person. Shallow doesn't completely describe me, but neither does ugly. I met this chic through a hookup site, and I knew that no one really got my attention. Until, of course, I took the time to get to know someone. 

no PDA
She contacted me first and I took two days to respond. When I finally replied, she just sent back her number. I shot her a line thanking her for the gesture and waited another two days before using the number. After a day of monotony and boredom, I decided to spice up my evening. I gave her a call. We talked for hours, discussing  our current situations, aspirations for more and how exactly we ended up on the site. She expressed that she was new to the "gay world" and didn't appreciate any public displays of affection(PDA).
Side Note: As women we always assume that we can change someone; help them grow and hopefully work our way into their heart. I took her PDA thing as a challenge. Oh! How I love a challenge.
Eventually, our conversations became sexual, primal even. She was just as horny as I was, so we scheduled a date. She wanted to do dinner and a movie; I agreed. Before our date, I thoroughly reviewed my dates dating profile pictures. I developed a feeling that my date was a big girl. 
Side Note: Now, let me clarify my thought process. All of my previous girlfriends were women of small stature. Eventually, my friends just agreed that I didn't like thick or full-figured women. For the record, this isn't the case at all. Full-figured and thick is lovely, but sloppy, well it's a no go. I myself am not skinny, but I am also in no way extremely over weight.
Once I realized my date may not be my physical favorite, a part of me relaxed. This also may sound shallow, but once I realize a date is less physically attractive then I am, I feel like no work is needed. What did boost my dates "cool points" was her confidence. Immediately, upon our meeting I knew this chic thought her shit smelt like roses. We talked as we made our way to the restaurant and got to know one another. Half way through dinner, she mentioned the movie, and I had already decided I was going to head home because I wasn't physically attracted. She seemed disappointed, but we paid the bill and walked out.

She stopped in the middle of our pace and told me she wasn't letting me end it so quickly. She asked if I had ever been to Chelsea Market, and I hadn't. She grabbed me by the hand and we made our way. She gushed over these brownies they served and she had to have one. We stopped for a minute and I began to realize I did find her attractive, and technically, for all the right reasons. I forgot about her PDA rule and put my arm around her. She smiled and we headed to the pier. She sat near the edge and I got real close to her neck. Purposely trying to evoke an emotion with this PDA. She bit her lip and I knew I had her. We parted ways and she ensured me this would not be our final date.

A few days passed, and I finally made it to her apartment. Here, she had no issue with affection. We kissed, she groped my ass, and I got her in the sack. She loved the feel of my skin against hers and I enjoyed her unshakable level of confidence. She really had no reason to feel otherwise. She was well-educated, independent, financially sound, her family is loving and part of the upper-middle class.

This persisted for a few weeks, and I was even able to get her to let me strap up. Now, if you're unsure about what this means just Google it. I was proud to have taken her virginity. We were a make-shift couple that required no labels. 

Here is where I got too comfortable, yes, me!

One night, I got a bit too tipsy and started sharing parts of my past that I usually keep to myself. I opened up only because I felt comfortable, and I might have even suggested that I wanted to put a title onto this thing. I also pushed the PDA thing, by hugging her from behind while we walked down a street together. This intricate combination of blabber mouth and touching was a fatal combination. She went back to Connecticut to visit family, and it was the nail in the proverbial coffin. A few days later, I received a text that didn't really have to spell it out because I'm no fool. She was ending it on the grounds of my not respecting her PDA request, and she also felt I needed to work on myself. I'm assuming that last part was based on my drunk confessions.

***

far too confident chic
Far Too Confident Virgin did to me, what I had done to many others. I rushed into something, and we all know fools rush in. She reminded me that being on the rebound isn't the best time to give away too much of yourself because at that time you're looking for that relationship feel, prematurely. She also taught me that when someone doesn't enjoy kissing, hugging, or any form of PDA that is someone that I cannot be with. I relate physical expression with emotional expression (I'm such a girl in that way).Most of all I learned that gut instincts sometimes shouldn't be overlooked, and when someone tells you who they are, believe them.

Wherever Far Too Confident Virgin is, I'm sure she's doing absolutely fine!


This is the third story of the lesbian online dating series here are part 1 & part 2.

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