Tuesday, November 27, 2012

The Side-Chic: Moving on Up


All throughout the content on this blog I mention portions of my own experiences with relationships. Several times I've mentioned dating, hooking up, and even cheating. When we are young some of us have this "you only live once (YOLO)" mentality, but it's usually more of an excuse to explain our temporary and fleeting emotions. Recently, someone close to me decided to leave their main girlfriend for their side-chic. In fact, the  side-chic has now taken on the role of main chic, seemingly overnight. Now, before we continue, let us define the "side-chic".
Via UrbanDictionary.com: the other woman; also known as the mistress; a female that is neither a male's/female's wife or girlfriend who has relations with the male/female while he/she is in another relationship. Synonyms include: shorty-on-the-side, mistress, side-dish and homewrecker.
the sidechic cheating on your girlfriend image
 For centuries, there have always been side-chics. Some marriages rest on the shared knowledge of the side-chic. Some marriages actually survive because of this person, but the side-chic must remain as such. She can never become anything more and she cannot ask for anything more than she is given. Consider great Kings that had mistresses and concubines that were known by the Queen. She did not direct anger at these chosen individuals because her role was never at risk; she was Queen no matter whom the King shared sex with the night before. This was acceptable because the King knew how to keep the mistress in her position. Like the game of chess, the pawn cannot overtake the Queen.

cassie and diddy sidechic image
Cassie and Diddy: one of the most public side-chic relationships
Today, things have changed; side-chics are no longer remaining side-chics. What has happened to cause such a reversal in power? Is it the man or woman involved in the relationship that have given their side-chic the power?

In the case of my friend, it was the main chic that lost her power long ago. That void then had to be filled by someone and the side-chic began to take on main chic properties. I've always felt that infidelity in a relationship is not the fault of the person on the side, but of the person that cheats. That side-chic is not supposed to care about the relationship they are intruding on.

As a person that has been in this position, I have been able to keep the person on the side, to the side. Maybe it's that I have cheated for different reasons or just that I know how this games works, but one must never allow the side-chic to switch her position. Remember, how you get the person is how you keep 'em. Plus, any side-chic foolish enough to get involved with the person they helped cheat is silly, what makes you so different from their main chic? Nothing, so it can happen to you(side-chic).

All-in-all, I know that my friend wasn't satisfied in the relationship; this was bound to happen. It does not make it right,  but it is not surprising. Where my friend went wrong, and where they usually go wrong, is in switching positions. A pawn cannot become a Queen.

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